My 12 year old niece and I were chatting on Facebook the other day (me towards the end of a working day and her, sick at home from school) and I asked her whether she was chatting from the computer, tucked away under the stairs in their hallway. 

No, she tells me, she is chatting from her laptop in her room.

Nice, is what I think: a 27 year-old working woman who dreams of laptop ownage (one day, when she is all big and grown up) but who needs to pay the rent and derust her motor vehicle instead.  Niiiice.

I walked into my twin’s kitchen to pilfer an Early Grey tea bag from her supplies this morning (thanks Bon!), only to discover her new Blackberry charging its happy way into functional existence next to the toaster.

Nice, is what I think: a Blackberry for a lady whose husband phones me and everyone else potentially hanging with her for the day, in order to get hold of her because her phone is never quite on her person and not too much of a priority for her daily existence. 

Niiice 😉

Fortunately, despite my itching fingers that would thrill at stroking the keys of my very own, portable Apple, I am not too much of a materialistic soul- and I have discovered the perks of living on a tight, tight budget and having to trust God for the rest:  which is what I actually want to talk about…

Last month I sat down with myself, my God, my existing budget and the budget I would prefer to be working from and I, quite honestly and frankly, asked God, if at all possible, to move me towards the preferred budget as He saw fit.

Last month I house/cat sat for three long weekends in a row and worked some transcribing hours in that clocked my actual budget to within a few hundred rands short of my preferred budget: without me having to find the work or the money on my own.

(Yes chaps, God does not hear us, nor does He exist, you are right.  It’s all down to science and evolution and Karma- you are right.  Ja, you are right, trusting God is for the birds…!)

Anyways.  THIS month the realization of winter has wrapped its frozen fingers around our wind, our sun and our warmth supplies.  I have not budgeted for winter clothes this month as I cannot budget for clothes this month.  Simple.

THIS month I was generously given a pair of jeans and at least 4 winter tops from ladies in my church, who could not fit into their new purchases, or who were simply cleaning out wardrobes for the month.  (I have come to LOVE hand-me-downs and bargains over these past few years so am tickled pink when people pass clothes my way or when I walk into a shop and find something going for dirt cheap.  In my teen years I saw it as mortifying.  The older I get, the less I care: a far more useful approach for life, me thinks)

What I love about God’s involvement in my budget is that, when I receive things this way I know that 1.) He sees me 2.) He loves me and cares for me 3.) He knows what I need and I can trust him with needs and wants along the way.  It always surprises me when He does it, don’t get me wrong.  I never feel that I have arrived somehow that my God would care for me that way: but He does.

I also think that, if I ever get to the place of actually being able to afford all the things I need, I will miss that sense of being provided for by El-Shaddai, the All Sufficient Father…


4 thoughts on “Provision

  1. I loved your blog. Its amazing needing work shoes (and I wear mine every single day) and searching and searching and searching for the best buy (waterproof, pretty, cheap yet elegant! what a combination) and then taking a random last pair off a shelf, arriving at the till and finding out I only have to pay R 62.00 rather than R 200.00!!! Hectic.

    Or being given three pairs of jeans from my glamorous sister in law (jeans I would never have bought on my own) :0)

    I never feel so looked upon by God as when the thing that I’m really needing (and I mean actually need not just like and want to have) gets handed to me without my having mentioned it!

    • I hear you Marijke.

      Ive gone to the counter plenty times and had clothes scan in cheaper. I then do a little jig (pleased as punch) and the cashier lady looks at me like im mad :).

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