Eyes Wide Open – the attempt

Tis the season to change the previous three years of sickening habit, tralalalala- la-la-lala.

For the past few years I have found my soul crawling towards the festive season with a sense of gnawing and perceived lack.

There is something about this time of year that acts as a huge spotlight onto ones social circumstances.

My previous plan of action to stave off this glaring, intrusiveness was to long for company, find company, date company and then be dumped by or dump company by April/May.

Siiis!

I can feel my emotional sphere already starting to gear up for this. Let’s call it the Prowl. Part of me would like to: that small part of my soul that believes that such behaviour is the Answer.

Fortunately the penny has dropped for me: I do not long to scrape my innards from off of the floor where they have been dropped by a significant other, nor do I want to subject anyone else to a similar experience!

I was listening to a man called Arthur Burke the other day. He challenged his audience to 90 Days of looking for what IS versus 90 days of grumbling about what isn’t.

The minute I find my melancholically-inclined brain steering me towards my list of longings, I need to zap it with a few minutes of stretching my eyeballs wide enough to take in the things I might not be seeing. It is good medicine, really. Because my brain that has been wired to think ‘without this and that I cannot possibly be happy’ needs to be told that it is trusting in pure nonsense really.

There are some glaring delights right in front of my face that i need to learn to perceive, enjoy and embrace. Here’s to getting on with it!

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